As we begin a new year, I want to ask you to consider taking actions that benefit others and that can make a big difference in your life as well.
The first thing I would like to suggest is that you contact someone from your past and say hello. Reach out and tell them about the positive things they have done to affect your life. We all have friends and loved ones we have lost touch with and reconnecting would be mutually beneficial.
I recently met a newly injured young man, who complained that his friends did not ask him to go places with them like they used to. I tried to impress upon him that as we go through life we change, and that our real friends find ways to include themselves in our lives. I also told him that individuals with mobility impairments have to make a different level of effort to be included. For years we were the ones who were left in the house, who were looked past, who were talked past. We were the ones who were invisible. Well, now we are a force for all to see: we are leaders in business, lawyers, doctors, teachers, and carpenters. We are racecar drivers, tennis professionals, and coaches. We are in all “walks” of life. It is our responsibility to reach out and continue the groundwork that has been laid before us.
The next step in that change is with our friends. We need to help them look past our mobility impairments and let us take responsibility for deciding what we can or cannot do. So, yes, you do need to take the action to be included in activities with your friends, but you also need to know and respect your own physical limitations.
Finally, I would ask each member to perform at least one “random act of kindness.” The only rule is that you not directly benefit from it. I am sure you are going to feel so good, it might even become a habit. The benefit is that when a nondisabled person sees you helping someone, the rest of the world sees the goodness of our hearts, not the constraints of the equipment we need to take part in our everyday lives.
After you have reached out to the friends from your past and performed at least one “random act of kindness,” write it down and tell me about your experience. I’m willing to bet the New Year starts on a happy note for at least two people.
Be well. Be as active as you can be.
Clair Russell Hesselton, PhD
President
