By Scott Chesney

This month I write to you with a very heavy heart. Over the years I have met with dozens of families who have had loved ones take their lives after both short, and long-term battles with paralysis, but for whatever reason a recent suicide from a friend of mine’s cousin who was paralyzed in a motorcycle accident, just last year, is lingering in my mind. How is this situation any different from any other time that I have been informed of a suicide? This young man left a note, almost in the form of a book that he wrote as he was taking his life.

Before I go any further, please know that I am not a mental health professional or an expert on this subject, so if you or anyone that you know is showing any signs of depression or suicidal tendencies, please contact a mental health professional immediately. I am merely sharing with you my insights gained not only from connecting with people who have been clinically depressed or even suicidal, but from my own contemplation of ending my life in the past.

This is a very serious issue and shouldn’t be waved away or swept under the rug because it is too uncomfortable or too much of a downer. Probably the majority of people with spinal cord injury or who have experienced traumatic adversity in their lives have thought about suicide. I feel compelled to devote at least one column to this subject.

Returning to the story that I began to share with you, I was so deeply moved by what this young man had shared during his remaining moments here on earth. He was three months away from attending law school, had a girlfriend, loved being outdoors, and one day wanted to become a philosophy professor. Before his accident, it appeared his life was all about movement; once he broke his back, he believed that was all taken away from him.

While reading this story several times, I find myself missing this person whom I spoke to only once, when he was initially injured. His writings are full of life in all its colors—light and dark—and offer insight into what so many people with SCI may be thinking on a daily basis, but choose not to share with others.

Daily living with paralysis can be lonely, exhausting, challenging, and a living hell, this young man wrote. I don’t disagree. But living with an SCI can also be rewarding if you look hard enough and sometimes not even look at all. Not once did I read anything from this man’s story that resembled the word rewarding, and that makes me understand the hopelessness he was experiencing.

I was once told that hope was an acronym for Hold On, Possibilities Exist. I know that I will never walk or roll in another man’s shoes, but I do know that, for me, hope is always present and that there are rewards or blessing in disguise in any adversity I have ever experienced.

When I had my first serious thought about taking my own life in 1999 during my first world tour, a voice came to me that had saved me in 1985 when I was originally paralyzed. I put on hold for a while before it resurfaced. That voice was my heart speaking, and in that moment, in Athens, Greece, it said, “Stop looking outside yourself for happiness. Create it within you first!”

If I had stayed in the madness of my mind, I might not be here today to share this with you. Thankfully for me and so many others who trust the wisdom of their hearts, there is always hope and an understanding to any life challenge. When we live from our minds, it is about fear, limitations, disbelief, and playing small in life. When we live from our hearts, then it is about operating from a place of courage, expansion, and a belief that anything is possible. Don’t be a prisoner to the mind’s warden. You call the shots. Your mind is your prisoner and your heart holds the key.

Scott Chesney, paralyzed 22 years ago as the result of a rare stroke, is a popular international motivational speaker and life coach. You can reach him via e-mail at chesney12@comcast.net.

This column is intended for informational purposes only and should not be construed as offering medical advice. If you have a medical condition requiring attention, please seek the help of qualified medical professionals.